Thursday, March 29, 2012


We have the opportunity

to watch creation display

such beautiful majesty.


Baby, as you've grown within me,
I've been scared for my life and yours.
I've had hope that no matter what comes, it will be what we need, what God wants for us.
I've had trust that you will be what He wants you to be.

My fear has given way to hope.
My hope has laid claim on trust.
I can rest knowing that you will grow that you are not mine.
You are a miracle that doesn't belong to me.

My life has brought you life, but He has sustained you.
He has taken care of what I cannot.
He has held you in a place for more than 9 months.
A dark place. A scarred place.

What was once an empty place, He filled with a miracle.
Where there was sorrow, He has brought joy.
We feel you kick and hit, and we wonder who you will become.
Your life, intertwined with mine, reliant on me.

My life, intertwined with God's, reliant on Him.
Little miracle, tiny inside me, shaped and formed with a purpose,
You are a miracle that doesn't belong to me.
I have carried you, but you were never mine.

You are His.
You are ours to take care of for a few years if He wills.
We were a family before you came,
But we welcome you with open arms and hearts, little one.

You are His. You are a miracle.

LLB March 2012

Team Hoyt

In My Heart

"Sanity is the madness, but the maddest of all is to see life as it is and not as it should be." Don Quixote

In each heart bears a mark of the desire of eternity. A cry that says, "If this is it, then what is the purpose?" Ecclesiates points out the futility of living for this life alone. If we gain wealth in this life, what happens to it when we die? If we gain pleasure, can it follow us to the grave? Things are meaningless. From a purely physical standpoint, life is very meaningless. But we were created with meaning, with a purpose that goes beyond the physical. We were created for a purpose.

The ability of a soul to know and be known is something we can only do with another human while we alive. We can know the God of the universe, he can know our soul. Soul interaction, the real heart of a person passes with them when they go to be with God. We can remember the things they did, but those conversations, those thoughts, those ideas unique to the soul He created will be gone with the person. It is in the heart, the soul that humans desire to be known, loved, accepted. This soul, this person, has the ability to know and be known.

If pain and pleasure, mingled in this life, give way to 'no more sorrow, no more tears' how will my existence change? The cancer, the infertility, the divorce, the sin that seems so daily a part of life--from the headlines on the paper, to the hatred people carry for one another of different races, creeds, and persuasions--what will it be like when Jesus makes everything right? And there it is, the eternity in my heart. A desire for things to be set right, and a knowing that I can't set them right. But a knowing that one day, they will be set right.

As I gaze upon the stars, I think of what it will be like to live in a new heaven and new earth. The stars, will there be more of them, and will we explore them? The grass, will it struggle so with the weeds? Will there be new fruits and vegetables to enjoy beyond what I know? I can't weave heaven into gold streets and mansions that childhood stories made beautiful. He will create a new heaven and a new earth. From what John reveals, his words even had trouble describing.

Life isn't as it should be. But one day it will be all that was intended and more. We will know, and be known.

And that is life as it is intended, as it should be.
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